i need a little help...

okay, so i've come to terms that justin and i will not be leaving the state for some time, probably two to three years. depressing, disheartening, but reality. so in that time, i really really really do not want to live in any more rented space.

since we've moved into this duplex, i've done little more than place the furniture, put up a few decorations and keep up with the cleaning. i haven't unpacked most of my clothes. i just haven't felt like there was any point since we'd be leaving.

this place isn't all bad. its large. there's a backyard for the dogs, and a laundry room in which to keep the litter pans. there's even an extra bedroom. and i haven't even done anything with that. the biggest plus? the landlord. she's great, and says we're her best tenants. considering the rest of the neighborhood, i can see why.

the cons? well, the neighborhood, obviously. its a low income area, lots of section 8. i didn't know anything about this area until i moved here. not that i've had any problems, thank the Lord. its highly transient, and full of obvious gang meetings and drug deals. i'd go as far as to say prostitution. i know it happens, and i'm pretty sure i've seen the negotiation from my car as i'm driving home late at night.

but as i've said, i've had no problems with anyone. having a big dog helps! :)
i feel helpless to make this place my own because of my discontent of the area, and also the restrictions of renting. i can't paint, and i can't change any of the outdated features of the place.

so, all that being said, i'm ready to buy a house. ready is such a loose term here, really.

so here's where i need help. first, i ask that you'd lift justin and i up in prayer. we need the Lord's guidance in this matter first and foremost.
secondly, i need advice! i've only started to look at houses once, and that ended when we moved back into my mom's for a bit.

so what do you think? should i continue renting? should i buy? our lease here is up in february. it gives us some time at least. plus, the possibility of finding another place to rent with our zoo is next to impossible. there you have it.

Ode to My Jill (best viewed on anything BUT mozilla)

It occurs to me that there is not nearly enough of jill on here. i shall remedy this fact. So here goes, the "ode" of sorts to my jill...

i met jill my sophomore year of highschool. she was a year ahead of me, still is, i never let her forget it. except for that two week period where we're the same age. but i digress...

since meeting, we've been pretty much inseperable. if you don't count her living in wilburton, talequa, boston, tulsa, dallas and new york city as separation- i mean, we don't.

we both have a little bit of a thing for cinnamon dulce lattes at starbucks. we consume more than is possibly healthy on a routine basis when around each other, which greatly contributes to our "less than adult" behavoir. or does it? some would argue that we don't need such fuel, for it the behavoir comes from within us- that there is no such need for any such catalyst. some are pretty much right.

here is an example. jill lives in nyc. i went to visit. we did some touristy things. touristy childish things. you would think a five year old would put on the hat and turn the fake wheels. no. we did. and we're proud. we got candy. it went well with our coffee(S).

that first year we met, we were volunteering for NHS by gift wrapping at the mall. i don't remember if we were done or if we were on a break, but jill suggested that we get our pictures taken with santa. it had started. the first of many traditions. this past christmas (when i went to visit) we had our picture taken with santa for the TENTH YEAR IN A ROW. now, i capitalize that because i've never been able to say i've done something for ten years straight and it sorta makes me feel old. hah. sorta? it really does. the good thing is that i counterbalance that feeling with what i actually have done for all those ten years. pictures with santa in matching outfits with my best friend after drinking lots of sugary coffee does not count as old. and we don't intend on stopping this tradion any time soon.

one of these days i'll put a post up that shows all ten years.

jill is one person that i know i can say absolutely anything to and she won't think less of me for it. she understands me and has such a way of making me feel comfortable. when i got married, she'd already been married for three years. i was so relieved to find that the struggles i was having in my first year were not crazy and that she'd felt like i did in many situations.

we've crossed many bridges in our friendship (pun intended). i still remember the time she'd just come from chemo and we'd met for lunch and i told her that i didn't think that she and jd should get married. it made her cry. jd just said that he appreciated my input. tense moment. but i knew we had the bond that wouldn't be weakened by my opinion, and i felt i couldn't not tell her. they did, in fact, still get married despite what i said, and i can tell you that i've never been happier to be wrong. in november they'll be celebrating their sixth anniversary. they've been together through thick and thin. cancer, law school, a million moves. i admire their ability to get along and work through issues. even more, i appreciate the invaluable knowledge that jill is learning in her marriage and then passing along to me.

the next couple of pictures are from her 27th birthday, dec 4 in nyc, first at nobu sushi for lunch when we met up with jd on his lunch break and then at the bubble lounge where jd had organised a small gathering for friends to celebrate.

here she is undoubtably telling some story about something. undoubtably.

she has the uncanny ability to make friends very quickly in any situation and to bring fun into everything. she's definitly taught me to be myself even more than i thought possible. of course, some may seek out her destruction for this fact, but what can i do?

when jd graduated law school, they went on a trip to italy. this was my favorite of all her pictures. and there were a ton!

here are a couple more pictures of my jill. some of you have met her, and of course love her. some of you have never met her, but who knows, that may change. she is, afterall, my cohort in taking over the world... :)

i loves me my jill

because i can't believe calista hasn't enjoyed this...

get ready to cry....grab a kleenex...

i'm crying...

i haven't laughed this hard since "farting preacher 4"

turn your sound WAY up...

See more funny videos at CollegeHumor

Recovery remains uncertain for Lake Hefner bird | NewsOK.com

update: some of you may have heard about this. the only surviving baby bird was taken to justin's mom who took it to wildcare, an organization she volunteers for on a full-time basis. the baby bird has died....justin's working on a petition of sorts to get this guy prosecuted to the fullest extent.


Another update. My mother, who has been helping take of the bird already told me that she wasn't doing to well... sad

read more | digg story

i love my babies

murphie got spayed on wednesday. she was still in season due to cystic ovaries, so we had to pay double the amount, but it was a good thing we got that caught. the vet said that was why she was constantly in season. drove me crazy, but it was never as bad as the time she had to wear diapers. i can tell she's not feeling to well, and i feel bad. but there's nothing i can do. weirdly enough, she's decided that she must have her ball with her at all times. even in bed at night. it has a bell. fun times.
our next door neighbors have dogs that stay outside all the time. they're not extremely well cared for, but they're not suffering either. they have fleas. so do our dogs now. well, not murphie, she got that taken care of at the vet. poor william, however, is a scratchin' fool. he's still a happy guy, and LOVES the fan that we put on the patio to help with the heat during the day. we also finally got a weedeater to help with the yard. we dont' have the money for a lawnmower at the moment, but we dont' really have much grass in our small yards to justify buying one. a weedeater will suffice. we found one for $9 at home depot! its obviously not the best of the best, but i don't care, it was nine dollars!! that will help with the fleas too, when we spray the yard. we're going to also frontline everybody. maybe me and justin too, as the fleas may switch to us when there's nothing to eat. the weird thing is, is when i talked to the vet and he told me murphie had fleas, he told me if i put on white socks and walked around, i'd have little black dots on my socks. those are fleas he said. also to put a white sock on my hand and run it under the bed and i'd find them there too. i wear white socks nearly every day (i know, not what i used to wear!) and i don't see them anywhere. the way he talked, i should be infested. i haven't seen a single flea. i guess murphie had most of them? i dunno, but i know william has them since murphie does not.
while typing that paragraph, i looked up to see piere leaning on my remaining floor lamp and in slow motion i yelled "NO!" as it came crashing to the ground. i just spent about half an hour cleaning up glass. tiny tiny shards too. and its my remaining lamp because he's done it before. at our other place. grrr. i guess i'm not destined for nice floor lamps.
so i was going to say something nice about piere. but he's now on my poo list. its a good thing he's so cute and cuddly or he'd be sleeping in the laundry room tonight.
okay, something nice: piere has recently taken up a new napping position on the floor. i don't know what started it, but he likes it. weirdo.

i had an extra bag of cat food in the cabinets above the washer and dryer. the kitty and piere have been snacking on it lately. it was too cute to cut out immediately. but it has since been removed and put with the rest of their food in the plastic bin i've got. no more extra snacking for the two lards i've got. the kitty is well, he's still an grumpy old man and he's still fat. we still love him though.
riley is the same. cute and photogenic as ever. still a bit wild at times, but makes a habit of coming to visit me and sit in my lap for about two minutes every day. i love it!
last but not least, we have fred. the reclusive, elusive fred. occassionally she graces us with her presence and we have to photograph the moment so that we can remember what she looks like. okay, so she's not nearly as bad as she used to be, we usually see her early in the morning and late at night. usually when we're busy or ready to go to bed.


so that's it for now. stay tuned for more baby pictures in the future! i'll be uploading them to flickr soon.

my continuous lesson...

on new year's eve, justin and i went to a party. at the end of the night, we were each given a small piece of a plant that the hostesses had found root bound in a pot. they divided it up and put each piece into a glass vase with water. it was to be a new beginning for the new year.

it stayed at my mom's house when we moved. i actually forgot about it. it didn't seem that it had grown at all, and even though my mom said that it was fine in water till it grew roots, i was the skeptic.

tuesday, justin drove down to my mom's to get our few remaining things there and brought back the plant, and it had actually sprouted roots AND a few more leaves. all that in just a bit of old water. we potted it into some soil and it looks rather nice.

justin had a dr's appointment to go to on friday. he didn't make it, it was so bad on sunday (pain progressed to the other side of his back and other leg) that he called in on monday and they got him right in. he called me at work and told me that i needed to come pick him up when the nurse called because they decided to do an epidural right then and there.

i picked him up and took him home, not fully understanding what had happened. or what was meant to happen. when i finally got home from work, he explained that the hope was that the epidural would help the pain enough for him to begin exercises and physical therapy. however, the injection might take days to work, and might not work at all. neither of us got our hopes up. we were, however, ecstatic that this doctor was taking his situation seriously.

the next day was no different from any other day. still pain, no relief. on wednesday, however, he called me and told me that he didn't want to get his hopes up, but he thought it might be working. we both had busy days and when it was time to go to bed that night, we layed in bed for hours and just talked. this was the justin i had dated, fallen in love with, married. i teared up several times when i thought about how much i had missed him and how great it was to have him back, if only for that night.

he's feeling better day by day. its not a fix, but it is pain management. he's able to take much less medicine now, and is going to see the doctor friday and hopes to talk about physical therapy.

if the God of creation can allow a plant whose nutrients are from the soil to grow in plain water, how much more can He allow me (and justin!) to survive this trial. its not over, but we've at least been given a break.

thanks so much to all of you for your prayers and support. please continue to pray and praise the Lord for what He has done, and all that He plans to do. i am so thankful that He cares so much that he continually shows me His boundless love.