These last couple of months are nearly a blur. so many things have gone on that i know i won't be able to recount everything.

my first semester back in school came and went. it was tough. really tough. i cursed peter's name several times for telling me to take chemistry and physics in the same semester. even though i only had two classes, it was like having four, as both classes have extensive labs. i made out with B's in both. this semester i'm taking physics 2 and psych. i've managed to never have to take psychology till now. oh well. at least i'll be able to make an A in physics. i hope.

justin had to have back surgery. we had exausted all possibilities as far as treatments go and the doctor told us surgery was our only alternative. so because we'd already met so much of our out-of-pocket expense with the insurance we chose to have surgery in december. it was scheduled for the 23rd. let me now expound upon the worst christmas-time in history.

jill came into town. not knowing how justin's surgery would dictate our time together, we hung out for about two evenings and went to have our pictures taken with santa for the twelveth year in a row.

the morning of the 23rd, justin and i went to check in for his surgery at the oklahoma spine hospital. after about an hour of waiting, we were taken back to the prep room where he recieved his gown and iv. my mom showed up, then his. he was taken back for surgery around one o'clock. i went to the surgery waiting room with our moms and visited and waited. after about an hour and a half, the nurse called to let me know they were done with the front and were about to start on the back. he would end up with a large incision on his stomach and two medium sized incisions on either side of his spine on the back.

my mom left after a while and justin's grandma arrived. about two and a half hours later the nurse called and he was finished, i would be able to see him soon.

he was wheeled out his way to his room and stopped long enough for us to be able to see him. he was in an excruciating amount of pain, i'm so glad he doesn't remember this part. his mom and grandma left at this point as it was beginning to get dark.

in his room, he was very uncomfortable. unable to sleep on his back or stomach, but having to be propped up by pillows to sleep on his side, every move was painful. because of the incision on the front of his stomach the doctor did not want to give him morphine.

the nurses told me to remind them about his medications every three hours. apparently i was staying. about three in the morning he was comfortable and sleeping and i was uncomfortable so i went home.

i knew check out time was noon if he were to be released so i was up and around by nine. justin had called earlier to tell me the weather was horrible so not to come. yeah right. so i got ready and headed up there understanding it was very likely i'd be staying the night too. When i got there, i was told that the doctor had released him. it was christmas eve, and it was snowing heavily. so heavily i couldn't get into the circle drive where patients are picked up.

after about two hours he had eaten and we had been given extensive amounts of things to take home. bandages, a walker, a breather, an ice water machine and instructions. i had tried to move the car several time in that span and nothing. i was still stuck at the front of the hospital. luckily the hospital is small so he only had to walk a relatively short distance, just not as short as he would have had to walk otherwise. as you can imagine, it was difficult enough even the short distance. the snow was falling at an incredible rate and the wind was fast and icy. we loaded up and started on what should have been a twenty minute trip.

after driving less than 20 mph on the highway, we got off on 63rd as we needed to get his pain medication filled at a cvs. stopped at the light, we got stuck. as luck would have it, there was already a team of firefighters working on another car there. they pushed me a few feet and we were back on our way to the cvs. up until now, things were just seen as setbacks to me, i wasn't terribly concerned. i had my mind on simply getting justin home and settled. i knew with the weather that it would be insane to try to take him home first, so we pulled into the cvs and i parked in the spot with the least amount of snow. i was inside for probably 30 minutes while he waited in the car. here's where it starts to get really crazy.

after some trouble with the insurance and pharmacy i walked outside with half of my bags and a snow shovel. the snow drifts were to the top of my wheels if not higher in some places. the snow and wind were even worse than before. i ran back inside to get the rest of my things. after loading them up, i began the task of shoveling my way out of the spot i was in. i was completely stuck. couldn't go forward or backward. justin must've looked like a jerk since he wasn't helping me. no one else would help either. no one.

for thirty minutes i battled. my hair was wet and then frozen into ropes. i couldn't feel my hands or feet. justin was understandably cranky. i had gone into the store to get something to melt the snow and give me traction. it didn't help. FINALLY, the store manager came out and helped me. after twenty more minutes or so, we were back to being on our way. somewhere in there i had hit justin in the head with the handle of the shovel. he was even crankier now, in pain from sitting in a car seat and not getting any more pain medicine.

i couldn't get to our garage or even up the driveway. i had to park in front of the house. justin had to walk all the way up the deeply snow covered drive with his walker. i helped him up laden with bags. i got him inside and dumped all the bags where i could and went down the drive for more. the snow was so deep it was like trying to run through water. i had to make five trips back and forth to get all of our things.

on my last trip i noticed that our neighbor was stuck so i went and tried to help them. how silly of me in hindsight, i needed to be inside getting justin settled. i was half way out of my head trying to get everything done. all i knew was what a horrible feeling it was to be stuck and not have anyone to help. so i helped them, and got no thanks or anything. just a "you can quit pushing now." so infuriating.

i managed to get back up the driveway, shut the garage door and begin to get things situated. oops, my phone was still in the car. here i go again. got it. back inside, ready to collapse.

i took some bags into the kitchen. nearly had a heart attack. justin had gone out onto the back patio. he came back in and almost fell. he pulled down half of my vertical blinds and tracked mud EVERYWHERE. i was nearly beside myself.

i put up all the things i had bought at cvs (i had not gone grocery shopping and while at cvs i realized that i would not be able to) and then i had to get justin's ice machine set up. its sorta like a heating pad only with a cooler that pumps ice water to two pads to reduce swelling on his surgery sites.

after getting that situated and getting him blankets and medicine and anything else he needed, i went to the bedroom to take off my soaking clothes and to get warm. at that point i just broke down and bawled for twenty minutes.

once i had regained what little composer i had left, i went back out into the house and commenced the complete cleaning of everything. i also spent quite a bit of time on the phone (which everyone knows how much i love) updating the families on justin. that was my christmas eve.

christmas day was the same. more cleaning. justin was more awake than he had been the day before, which meant more work for me, but it wasn't bad. the family got together, but after the day before i refused to get out. which was a good thing, considering i got stuck three more times in three days after this all happened.

so there's my sob story. now the good part.

since his surgery, his nerve pain is completely gone. he no longer kicks me at night and no longer jerks with pain in his sleep. his back still hurts but nothing like it did before. the surgeon said that his disc was so badly degenerated that he could see through it.

his pain is so much less that even his old personality is back. he's no longer cranky 97% of the time. last night was a bad night. he was hurting and didn't feel like doing anything. out of a week that's about the only time its happened. i'm so thankful.

john was home this past week and justin even felt like hanging out at my mom's till all hours of the night playing games and hanging out. he even played some games with us.

yesterday was his first day back to work and besides feeling a little sick at lunchtime, he did well. apparently today has gone well too.

so after saying all of that, i come to my point.

God is good. He allows us to go through troubles because it makes us stronger. i didn't know i could do all that on my own. i remember thinking several times about how i really wished my dad could be around to help me. but he's not. The Lord has shown me that all i need is Him. he is the one who provides for me and mine. He is always there for me, especially when i feel most alone.

thank you everyone who keeps me in your prayers. i appreciate it more than you'll ever know. thank you for your posts on here. i'm so surrounded by a god-less world everyday, its a relief to look over your blogs and see how He's working in everyone else's life.

prayer request

its been a long time since i've posted.... and this won't be a long one. i just needed to ask all my wonderful friends for some prayer...

nothing serious, just remember me when talking with our Heavenly Father.

I have been in school less than one semester and am already questioning my motivation and goals. are they really what i want or am i letting my pride lead me?

please pray that the Lord will lead me in the way i should go, that He would open and close doors accordingly.

sigh. and now back to my studies...

for a good time...

okay, maybe not a good time, but more like a good laugh, visit this website, read the reviews...you will not be disappointed. justin found this on digg and shared with me.  now i share with you. i'm a giver...  hehe

Hilarity <-----------

i've found the most wonderful website!  http://www.stilltasty.com  some of you may already know about it, sometimes i'm a little slow finding things!  justin and i are so busy most of the time we can't keep track of what's old and what's not. we're horrible about cleaning out the fridge till i'm gagging as the door closes.  course then its a full on over haul. 

and speaking of being busy, i've got another class starting monday.  i've got two for sure students and a possible third. (i've also got my dog thinking she's being sneaky in my lap right now...she thinks i dont' notice that she's inching toward my dinner)

i'm hopeful about these two students. being a vocational school of sorts, we get people with more baggage than an airport.  my last two students were a promising twenty year old with less than desireable transportation and no phone and a forty nine year old who was way over medicated, an insomniac and defined herself by her emotional troubles.   the older of the two has nearly finished her externship and should be looking for a job at this point. the younger, well, no one's heard from her after her first week and a half of externship. i fear there's no transportation, and that's horrible because she's such a smart, ambitious gal.  no one gets their certificate if they don't complete all their hours.  i like the teaching part, i'm not so fond of the social worker side of what i've been doing.  

anyway, the new two students, i've only met once, but i'm hopful.  one is a thirty-ish male, and the other is a fifty-ish female.  they seem like they've got it together, they just need something new.  maybe i'll have less social work to do this time...i can only hope.  

i've also decided that i'm going back to school.  i'm not sure exactly what my major will be, but i do plan on going to medical school.  its a long hard road, but i've been in the work force long enough that i don't want to be forty and work as a technician. so now, as opposed to when i was 18, i've got much more drive and a goal.  

after talking to my brother, things became much more resolved in my head.  he's in dental school, so i feel like i'll definitely have someone to help me on some of the tougher subjects, and someone to vent to when i'm taking 25 hours and going crazy. 

i'm excited though. i'm excited to finally know what i want to do, or at least the direction to head. 

i still have to decide what school to go to, and figure out financial aid.  that's going to be lovely. 

AND before i get started this fall, i'd really like to buy a house.  i'd like to take advantage of the stimulus fund...8,000 that i don't have to pay back?!  i'd be crazy not to do it. so i figure i need to do that before i take out all sorts of crazy student loans.   the really scary thing is leaving my job.  i'd like to say i could teach my class from eight till one and then go to school the rest of the day, but i don't know how realistic that is.  i guess we'll see.  at least i won't be working at the dr's office anymore once i start...and i'll miss it.  oh well, on to bigger and better things i suppose.  

i'll definitely need prayer, as i absolutely can't do this with out the Lord's help.  i'm a little a.d.d. sometimes and i know i'll get discouraged from time to time.  but with the support of all my friends and family i know i can accomplish something with my life.  

funny ha ha

sillies

man kids have the coolest toys to choose from now!! i want nearly all of them!  

(its sad.)  i'm 27. i watch lots and lots of cartoons.  i love them!  and during the commercials, i see all the cool new toys!  like zubber....okay, i would have had a heart attack to get something like that way back when.  i'd love to get it now.  and those stickers that you put foil on?  how cool is that?  if i had kids, they'd probably be mad cause i'd want to play with all their stuff and i'd use it all up!  

on an unrelated note, i just finished reading a book for the first time in i don't know how long.  i've attempted to read many books in the last year or so, and i've never been able to finish them.  none of them have been interesting enough to just sit down and finish.  (actually, i just now remember that i did read an entire book several months ago.  but i won't count that one.)

this one is a recent classic of 1959.  it is shirley jackson's the haunting of hill house.  if you saw the movie "house on haunted hill"  its not even close to the book, besides the characters traits and an occasional line from the house keeper. the movie was a bust in my opinion.  but the book is worth a read.  

on a note more related to the beginning of this post, spongebob is on, so i'll take my leave. 

eh

why is it that mostly men are prayed for during prayer meeting?  is it because men are better than women? is it because they have worse problems than women?  no.

i think it is because men are praying.  now, i'm not about to tell you i think women should get up and pray. absolutely not.  i just think that the men should think more about for whom to lift up to our Lord.  women are such the backbone to the body. women are the ones constantly lifting their husbands up, praying for the church. 

tonight, paul anderson and bob watts were prayed for.  paul anderson for safety on the road, and bob watts for healing.   amen to those things. but how about prayer for the safety and wellbeing of mary anderson while she's home alone? how about comfort and strength for janice watts during the trying time of having a sickly spouse?  

perhaps i'm a little sensitive because of my own situation. 

but i'm not being sexist. i'm not thinking in terms of conventional "equality" issues.  and i'm not above thinking that it is simply an issue i have with my own home assembly. 

growing up, all prayers were generally for my dad, his health, his strength.  i don't remember my mom ever being prayed for until near the end.  how is it that she, going through such an enormous struggle, was not lifted up until that point?  why was that not caught earlier?  i remember being puzzled about it then.  i also remember being puzzled about the fact that everyone always asked my mom how my dad was doing, but never how she was doing.  

i was puzzed about those things.  still am.  i'm more empathetic to whatever my mom must've felt now, being a spouse myself of a person not completely well.  and it didn't dawn on me till tonight that it was happening to me now.  

i understand concern and polite conversation.  but let's face it, if something is happening to our spouse, it might as well be happening to us.  we're one flesh, that's how it goes.   we need the support of our spiritual family just as much as from our physical family and our friends.  

i'm not even sure i can wrap this up logically.  my whole point is that we should all think beyond what conventional concern is. we should concern ourselves with spouses, children, parents, all those peripherally involved in a situation. perhaps we are missing someone the Lord is pointing to without pointing to them directly.  

so i've finally decided.  i'm going to do it.  i'm going to go back to school.  

freaky how things change in your head as you get older and "wiser".   i said when i finally finished my associates degree after five years that i was done. i hated school.  i hated taking general courses in which i had no interest whatsoever.  so i got my degree and left with no intention of ever going back. 

i've been assisting in the field of optometry for four years now. i've gotten to the point where i'm bored with what i'm doing.  its no longer challenging, and i never thought i'd think of feel that way.  i've gotten to the point where i feel i'm wasting myself.  its not that i'm the smartest person in the world, or even the most qualified, but i don't want to be a tech at the age of 45.  

so now the question is what to do.  the obvious answer has been to go to optometry school after completing my bachelors.  that avenue presents a few problems.  one is the fact that the only optometry school in oklahoma is in talequa. that's about two and half hours from here.  even if justin is done with school at that point, i'm sure he'll have a job in the city. so we'd have to (1) move to talequa and try to find work for him or (2) i'd have to commute and yeah right i'd be able to work at all while i'm in school.  and what about housing? then we'd have two rent payments.   the other problem with that scenario is that i'm not too keen on ONLY becoming an optometrist.  i really don't feel like refracting day in and day out.  i'd much rather deal with the medical side of the eye, i.e. glaucoma, cataracts, diabetic retinopathy, etc.  in oklahoma, i can treat and provide post-op care for most medical conditions affecting the eye. but ONLY in oklahoma.  (hmmm, i've capitalized only twice now...weird)   also, optometrists are about a dime a dozen here.  to make much money and recoup all the expenses of school, i'd pretty much have to open my own practice. when there's so many optometrists around, man, how would i get ahead?  

so then i'd need to go to medical school and become an opthamologist. so five, six more years. two hundred thousand dollars of debt later, i'd be an md, but at what real cost?   

so you can see my delima.  i keep talking myself out of all possibilities.  i've always had an interest in geology.  so why not try that?  but what course to even try?  then my first love has always been makeup for the stage, either special effects or high fashion.  how do i make any money at that?  i'd have to go to school in another state, probably california or ny to do that.  its all so confusing.  i don't really know what i want to do really.

justin got lucky.  programming found him.  and he's in love with it.  he looks forward to doing his job everyday. he loves his schoolwork (for the most part-you can't love it all).  i'm scared really.  probably of failure, but really because i don't know what i'm good at.  i've always been good at a lot of things, but i've never been great at anything.  kinda like a jack of all trades, master of none. that's me in a nut shell.  

i've enjoyed teaching the class for the school the dr i work for started.  in fact, the next class, i'll probably be working at the institute itself.  so maybe i can get some college credit for cheap...hehe.  but in all reality, i don't think i could deal with teaching people in this capacity forever.  

anyway, just needed to get a few of those thoughts out of my head and onto "paper".  

since september? really? okay okay so i've been putting it off. course like anything one puts off, the further one gets behind. then its nearly impossible to ever catch up. so i can't catch up. i admit defeat. i'll just start from here. here's a brief synopsis of what happened september to now:

october:
justin celebrated his 29th birthday. actually, he didn't, i and some close friend did by throwing a small party.
justin and i went to nyc for our first vacation together since our honeymoon. we were there for a little over a week. you can look at all of our pictures (that i've uploaded) on flickr.



november:
i got older. i vaguely remember someone saying i turned 27. yikes.
thanksgiving happened. we went the weekend before to my grandma's and visited with my aunt and uncle and cousins. it was so nice to do something like we did back when i was 1o.
all of us cousins got blankets and watched "hook" like we used to in the living room. the only thing that changed was that half of us fell asleep during the movie. darn getting old.

december:
wow. where to begin.
my sister in law turned 21. i threw a big party for her with the guy she's now dating.
john came home for a visit for about two weeks. previously mentioned family came down for a weekend to visit.
after two years at our north office, i transferred to our south office. its more of a drive, but worth it. i left contact lens administration behind forever and started scribing for the doctor. much much much much more interesting.
jill and jd came into town. i spent nearly everyday after work either visiting with jill or with my family. my entire house fell into disarray except for when i put up our decorations. and that didn't last long.
i ended the days of multiple celebrations with families for holidays. we spent christmas eve with justin's family, and christmas day with mine. we'll probably switch next year. same thing with thanksgiving. thank goodness we don't have kids. otherwise i'm told that would be impossible. we're considering going out of town on vacation next year. also impossible with children i hear.

january:
sleep.
seriously. i slept an entire weekend when it was all said and done.
then school started on the sixth. i'm not in school, i'm teaching it. crazy. the doctor i work for started "the oklahoma eye institute." it was awesome that i got to decide to cancel class yesterday. i actually called it in to the news stations too....hehe oh the power. in reality, i've only got two students. but that's good, considering its the first time i've ever taught. poor sods, i'm learning on them. you can check out the old website if you want to. www.oklahomaeyeinstitute.com.
actually, if we get a few more students next class, then i'll be able to stop working at the office to make up the remainder of my hours. its very tiring . class is 8-1 monday through friday. i have to work usually two or three days 2-7 and then every other week i work a saturday all day. so that's six days a week. plus i'm trying to go work out. plus i'm trying to go to church. i don't know how you people with kids survive!!!

okay, speaking of school, i'm going to brave the icy roads tomorrow morning so that i can have class. i now understand why school systems and teachers dislike having class cancelled. i have so much to teach, and so little time!

this picture cracks me up...

"what!?"

i need a little help...

okay, so i've come to terms that justin and i will not be leaving the state for some time, probably two to three years. depressing, disheartening, but reality. so in that time, i really really really do not want to live in any more rented space.

since we've moved into this duplex, i've done little more than place the furniture, put up a few decorations and keep up with the cleaning. i haven't unpacked most of my clothes. i just haven't felt like there was any point since we'd be leaving.

this place isn't all bad. its large. there's a backyard for the dogs, and a laundry room in which to keep the litter pans. there's even an extra bedroom. and i haven't even done anything with that. the biggest plus? the landlord. she's great, and says we're her best tenants. considering the rest of the neighborhood, i can see why.

the cons? well, the neighborhood, obviously. its a low income area, lots of section 8. i didn't know anything about this area until i moved here. not that i've had any problems, thank the Lord. its highly transient, and full of obvious gang meetings and drug deals. i'd go as far as to say prostitution. i know it happens, and i'm pretty sure i've seen the negotiation from my car as i'm driving home late at night.

but as i've said, i've had no problems with anyone. having a big dog helps! :)
i feel helpless to make this place my own because of my discontent of the area, and also the restrictions of renting. i can't paint, and i can't change any of the outdated features of the place.

so, all that being said, i'm ready to buy a house. ready is such a loose term here, really.

so here's where i need help. first, i ask that you'd lift justin and i up in prayer. we need the Lord's guidance in this matter first and foremost.
secondly, i need advice! i've only started to look at houses once, and that ended when we moved back into my mom's for a bit.

so what do you think? should i continue renting? should i buy? our lease here is up in february. it gives us some time at least. plus, the possibility of finding another place to rent with our zoo is next to impossible. there you have it.

Ode to My Jill (best viewed on anything BUT mozilla)

It occurs to me that there is not nearly enough of jill on here. i shall remedy this fact. So here goes, the "ode" of sorts to my jill...

i met jill my sophomore year of highschool. she was a year ahead of me, still is, i never let her forget it. except for that two week period where we're the same age. but i digress...

since meeting, we've been pretty much inseperable. if you don't count her living in wilburton, talequa, boston, tulsa, dallas and new york city as separation- i mean, we don't.

we both have a little bit of a thing for cinnamon dulce lattes at starbucks. we consume more than is possibly healthy on a routine basis when around each other, which greatly contributes to our "less than adult" behavoir. or does it? some would argue that we don't need such fuel, for it the behavoir comes from within us- that there is no such need for any such catalyst. some are pretty much right.

here is an example. jill lives in nyc. i went to visit. we did some touristy things. touristy childish things. you would think a five year old would put on the hat and turn the fake wheels. no. we did. and we're proud. we got candy. it went well with our coffee(S).

that first year we met, we were volunteering for NHS by gift wrapping at the mall. i don't remember if we were done or if we were on a break, but jill suggested that we get our pictures taken with santa. it had started. the first of many traditions. this past christmas (when i went to visit) we had our picture taken with santa for the TENTH YEAR IN A ROW. now, i capitalize that because i've never been able to say i've done something for ten years straight and it sorta makes me feel old. hah. sorta? it really does. the good thing is that i counterbalance that feeling with what i actually have done for all those ten years. pictures with santa in matching outfits with my best friend after drinking lots of sugary coffee does not count as old. and we don't intend on stopping this tradion any time soon.

one of these days i'll put a post up that shows all ten years.

jill is one person that i know i can say absolutely anything to and she won't think less of me for it. she understands me and has such a way of making me feel comfortable. when i got married, she'd already been married for three years. i was so relieved to find that the struggles i was having in my first year were not crazy and that she'd felt like i did in many situations.

we've crossed many bridges in our friendship (pun intended). i still remember the time she'd just come from chemo and we'd met for lunch and i told her that i didn't think that she and jd should get married. it made her cry. jd just said that he appreciated my input. tense moment. but i knew we had the bond that wouldn't be weakened by my opinion, and i felt i couldn't not tell her. they did, in fact, still get married despite what i said, and i can tell you that i've never been happier to be wrong. in november they'll be celebrating their sixth anniversary. they've been together through thick and thin. cancer, law school, a million moves. i admire their ability to get along and work through issues. even more, i appreciate the invaluable knowledge that jill is learning in her marriage and then passing along to me.

the next couple of pictures are from her 27th birthday, dec 4 in nyc, first at nobu sushi for lunch when we met up with jd on his lunch break and then at the bubble lounge where jd had organised a small gathering for friends to celebrate.

here she is undoubtably telling some story about something. undoubtably.

she has the uncanny ability to make friends very quickly in any situation and to bring fun into everything. she's definitly taught me to be myself even more than i thought possible. of course, some may seek out her destruction for this fact, but what can i do?

when jd graduated law school, they went on a trip to italy. this was my favorite of all her pictures. and there were a ton!

here are a couple more pictures of my jill. some of you have met her, and of course love her. some of you have never met her, but who knows, that may change. she is, afterall, my cohort in taking over the world... :)

i loves me my jill

because i can't believe calista hasn't enjoyed this...

get ready to cry....grab a kleenex...

i'm crying...

i haven't laughed this hard since "farting preacher 4"

turn your sound WAY up...

See more funny videos at CollegeHumor

Recovery remains uncertain for Lake Hefner bird | NewsOK.com

update: some of you may have heard about this. the only surviving baby bird was taken to justin's mom who took it to wildcare, an organization she volunteers for on a full-time basis. the baby bird has died....justin's working on a petition of sorts to get this guy prosecuted to the fullest extent.


Another update. My mother, who has been helping take of the bird already told me that she wasn't doing to well... sad

read more | digg story

i love my babies

murphie got spayed on wednesday. she was still in season due to cystic ovaries, so we had to pay double the amount, but it was a good thing we got that caught. the vet said that was why she was constantly in season. drove me crazy, but it was never as bad as the time she had to wear diapers. i can tell she's not feeling to well, and i feel bad. but there's nothing i can do. weirdly enough, she's decided that she must have her ball with her at all times. even in bed at night. it has a bell. fun times.
our next door neighbors have dogs that stay outside all the time. they're not extremely well cared for, but they're not suffering either. they have fleas. so do our dogs now. well, not murphie, she got that taken care of at the vet. poor william, however, is a scratchin' fool. he's still a happy guy, and LOVES the fan that we put on the patio to help with the heat during the day. we also finally got a weedeater to help with the yard. we dont' have the money for a lawnmower at the moment, but we dont' really have much grass in our small yards to justify buying one. a weedeater will suffice. we found one for $9 at home depot! its obviously not the best of the best, but i don't care, it was nine dollars!! that will help with the fleas too, when we spray the yard. we're going to also frontline everybody. maybe me and justin too, as the fleas may switch to us when there's nothing to eat. the weird thing is, is when i talked to the vet and he told me murphie had fleas, he told me if i put on white socks and walked around, i'd have little black dots on my socks. those are fleas he said. also to put a white sock on my hand and run it under the bed and i'd find them there too. i wear white socks nearly every day (i know, not what i used to wear!) and i don't see them anywhere. the way he talked, i should be infested. i haven't seen a single flea. i guess murphie had most of them? i dunno, but i know william has them since murphie does not.
while typing that paragraph, i looked up to see piere leaning on my remaining floor lamp and in slow motion i yelled "NO!" as it came crashing to the ground. i just spent about half an hour cleaning up glass. tiny tiny shards too. and its my remaining lamp because he's done it before. at our other place. grrr. i guess i'm not destined for nice floor lamps.
so i was going to say something nice about piere. but he's now on my poo list. its a good thing he's so cute and cuddly or he'd be sleeping in the laundry room tonight.
okay, something nice: piere has recently taken up a new napping position on the floor. i don't know what started it, but he likes it. weirdo.

i had an extra bag of cat food in the cabinets above the washer and dryer. the kitty and piere have been snacking on it lately. it was too cute to cut out immediately. but it has since been removed and put with the rest of their food in the plastic bin i've got. no more extra snacking for the two lards i've got. the kitty is well, he's still an grumpy old man and he's still fat. we still love him though.
riley is the same. cute and photogenic as ever. still a bit wild at times, but makes a habit of coming to visit me and sit in my lap for about two minutes every day. i love it!
last but not least, we have fred. the reclusive, elusive fred. occassionally she graces us with her presence and we have to photograph the moment so that we can remember what she looks like. okay, so she's not nearly as bad as she used to be, we usually see her early in the morning and late at night. usually when we're busy or ready to go to bed.


so that's it for now. stay tuned for more baby pictures in the future! i'll be uploading them to flickr soon.

my continuous lesson...

on new year's eve, justin and i went to a party. at the end of the night, we were each given a small piece of a plant that the hostesses had found root bound in a pot. they divided it up and put each piece into a glass vase with water. it was to be a new beginning for the new year.

it stayed at my mom's house when we moved. i actually forgot about it. it didn't seem that it had grown at all, and even though my mom said that it was fine in water till it grew roots, i was the skeptic.

tuesday, justin drove down to my mom's to get our few remaining things there and brought back the plant, and it had actually sprouted roots AND a few more leaves. all that in just a bit of old water. we potted it into some soil and it looks rather nice.

justin had a dr's appointment to go to on friday. he didn't make it, it was so bad on sunday (pain progressed to the other side of his back and other leg) that he called in on monday and they got him right in. he called me at work and told me that i needed to come pick him up when the nurse called because they decided to do an epidural right then and there.

i picked him up and took him home, not fully understanding what had happened. or what was meant to happen. when i finally got home from work, he explained that the hope was that the epidural would help the pain enough for him to begin exercises and physical therapy. however, the injection might take days to work, and might not work at all. neither of us got our hopes up. we were, however, ecstatic that this doctor was taking his situation seriously.

the next day was no different from any other day. still pain, no relief. on wednesday, however, he called me and told me that he didn't want to get his hopes up, but he thought it might be working. we both had busy days and when it was time to go to bed that night, we layed in bed for hours and just talked. this was the justin i had dated, fallen in love with, married. i teared up several times when i thought about how much i had missed him and how great it was to have him back, if only for that night.

he's feeling better day by day. its not a fix, but it is pain management. he's able to take much less medicine now, and is going to see the doctor friday and hopes to talk about physical therapy.

if the God of creation can allow a plant whose nutrients are from the soil to grow in plain water, how much more can He allow me (and justin!) to survive this trial. its not over, but we've at least been given a break.

thanks so much to all of you for your prayers and support. please continue to pray and praise the Lord for what He has done, and all that He plans to do. i am so thankful that He cares so much that he continually shows me His boundless love.

random history lesson

a friend of mine posted this online and i thought it was pretty neat. i don't know how true all of it is, but its still fun to read. oh and obviously i didn't type it out, there are capitals in it. :) or is it capitols? i don't know. honestly don't care....read on:

The next time you are washing your hands and complain because the
water temperature isn't just how you like it, think about how things
used to be.

Here are some facts about the 1500s:

These are interesting...

Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath
in May and still smelled pretty good by June.
However, they were starting to smell, so brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odor Hence the custom today of carrying a bouquet when getting
married.

Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water.
The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water, then all the other sons and men, then the women and finally the children.
Last of all were the babies. By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it. Hence the saying, don't throw the baby out with the Bath water.

Houses had thatched roofs-thick straw-piled high, with no wood
underneath. It was the only place for animals to get warm, so all the
cats and other small animals (mice, bugs) lived in the roof.
When it rained it became slippery and sometimes the animals would slip and fall
off the roof. Hence the saying; It's raining cats and dogs.

There was nothing to stop things from falling into the house.
This posed a real problem in the bedroom where bugs and other droppings could
mess up your nice clean bed.
Hence, a bed with big posts and a sheet hung over the top afforded some protection.
That's how canopy beds came into existence.

The floor was dirt.
Only the wealthy had something other than
dirt. Hence the saying, "Dirt poor".

The wealthy had slate floors that
would get slippery in the winter when wet, so they spread thresh (straw)
on floor to help keep their footing.
As the winter wore on, they added more thresh until, when you opened the door, it would all start slipping outside. A piece of wood was placed in the entrance way.
Hence the saying a thresh hold.

(Getting quite an education, aren't you?)

In those old days, they cooked in the kitchen with a big kettle that
always hung over the fire.

Every day they lit the fire and added things
to the pot. They ate mostly vegetables and did not get much meat.
They would eat the stew for dinner, leaving leftovers in the pot to get cold
overnight and then start over the next day.
Sometimes stew had food in it that had been there for quite a while.

Hence the rhyme, Peas porridge hot, peas porridge cold, peas porridge in the pot nine days old..

Sometimes they could obtain pork, which made them feel quite
special. When visitors came over, they would hang up their bacon to show
off. It was a sign of wealth that a man could bring home the bacon.

They would cut off a little to share with guests and would all sit
around and chew the fat.

Those with money had plates made of pewter.

Food with high acid content caused some of the lead to leach onto the food, causing lead poisoning death.
This happened most often with tomatoes, so for the next
400 years or so, tomatoes were considered poisonous.

Bread was divided according to status.

Workers got the burnt
bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle, and guests got the top,
or the upper crust.

Lead cups were used to drink ale or whiskey.
The combination would sometimes knock the imbibers out for a couple of days.
Someone walking along the road would take them for dead and prepare them for burial.

They were laid out on the kitchen table for a couple of days and the
family would gather around and eat and drink and wait and see if they
would wake up. Hence the custom of holding a wake.

England is old and small and the local folks started running out
of places to bury people.

So they would dig up coffins and would take the bones to a bone-house, and reuse the grave.
When reopening these coffins, 1 out of 25 coffins were found to have scratch marks on the inside and they realized they had been burying people alive.

So they would tie a string on the wrist of the corpse, thread it through the
coffin and up through the ground and tie it to a bell.

Someone would have to sit out in the graveyard all night (the graveyard shift.) to
listen for the bell; thus, someone could be saved by the bell or was
considered a dead ringer.

And that's the truth...Now, whoever said History was boring!

this is calista's fault.....

please address all complaints to her blog.



Link to your tagger and post these rules on your blog.

Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog, some random, some weird.

Tag 7 people at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blogs.

Let them know they are tagged by leaving comments on their blogs.

1. i cannot sleep in pants. the legs wrap around and around and around and drive me insane. feel sorry for anyone i ever spent the night with while growing up.



2. i am horrified of crickets. they jump AT you, not away from you. they can fly.


3. i love to eat animal crackers with mustard.



4. when i was little my family went camping somewhere in utah. the campground had toilets with blue water and i had to stand on the lever to flush them. i loved both facts. i said many times that i needed to go to the bathroom when i didn't actually need to go. i just wanted to flush the cool toilets. my dad caught on and called me "beth blue water" for the rest of the trip. and then randomly after that for years.


5. when i shift into neutral, i have to toggle the gear shifter past reverse several times before i'm satisfied that i'm actually out of any gear.


6. i love cartoons above all other shows. spongebob is my favorite, but i love a good animae such as inuyasha or full metal alchemist. the japanese have a very specific formula to their story lines and the predictability is actually pretty funny.


7. i'm not very girlie, but if you came to my house and saw the decor, you'd think i was. this is mildly disappointing, but, i like what i like, i have to deal with it. so does my husband.


so there you have it, seven weird, random facts about moi. it took me two days to come up with these. its not that i have a lack of weird fact, oh no, its just that most would either offend someone or scare them. these were pretty friendly, i feel.

i'm going to tag some that calista tagged, but eh, they haven't done it yet!

1. april
2. michelle
3. rachel
4. ruth
5. amy
6. christina
7. brooke

sad sack update...

not feeling quite so down today. a welcome break in my melancholy streak.
seems as if the situation just couldn't get worse... (although i know it always could)

as soon as the end up april came around, we were on the phone with the dr's office in hopes of scheduling the long awaited mri. all of our insurance info was given. then i got a call from the dr's office saying that we've got a preexisting condition on our plan. being new to this whole grown up insurance world, i was not sure what to do. i called the insurance company and was told exactly what i was afraid of. they would not pay for the mri if justin had been seen in the last six months for something related. this made...makes me angry.

i called the dr's office and found out that there is a place called Servant Imaging in Norman. they do imaging services for poor people like us with stupid insurance companies. we set up the appointment for monday. it costs $600. the worst thing about paying the $600 is that it doesn't even get applied to our deductible...AND had we known this was going to be the case, we wouldn't have waited this long to do it!

so he went in for the mri. the dr called justin on her way home from work that same day to let us know the results. a slight bulging disc and some arthritic changes at the base of the spine. according to her, nothing to explain the amount of pain he's describing. she wants to send him to a neurologist. i don't know what for, but i guess it doesn't matter, because unless the government decides to send out another stimulus check, he won't be going for a long while. the preexisting on his ins is until 2009!

so he got another rx for some pain meds, but who really wants that. again. not i said the wolf.


so on a better note, i have to thank you all soooooo much for your encouragement and prayers. you have no idea how much it has helped. i don't feel so incredibly alone, its nice to know that people care so much. i've learned two verses thanks to you guys. II cor 3:5 and 4:17. they're posted on my mirror in the bathroom so that i look over them every morning and evening as i'm getting ready for whatever is before me.

its incredible to think that even though we're deserving of death and hell, we're actually rewarded for suffering "light affliction." He is so good to us.

i'm sorry for the alarming amount of sad sack that has come out of me recently. or not come out...i know i should be answering phone calls, but i haven't been able to bring myself to bum anyone out on the phone yet. sorry christina...i'll make it up to you in a couple of days...promise. and calista, i've got an email headed your way soon.